


Holy Halloween, Alec Lightwood!

by la_muerta



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Canon Universe, Crack, F/M, Halloween, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-21 01:26:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16149650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/la_muerta/pseuds/la_muerta
Summary: There's a Halloween party at the Pandemonium - Izzy, Jace, Clary, and Simon all get in the spirit of things and dress up as superheroes and supervillains, but Alec just wants to go home.But the costumes are cursed, and now Alec and Magnus have to go stop them from destroying New York and killing each other.





	Holy Halloween, Alec Lightwood!

**Author's Note:**

> A fun thing written for the #SHHalloweenFic event organised by @BoomBitchesSH on twitter! ;)

 

 

By the angel, Alec hated Halloween.  

"Alec! You were supposed to wear your costume! Simon went to all that trouble to get us matching ones!" Izzy exclaimed when she saw him. 

"The stupid mask was blocking my vision, and I felt like an idiot," Alec grumbled. He glanced at her costume and frowned. "What kind of baseball player wears sequinned booty shorts and fishnet stockings?" 

"I'm not a baseball player, I'm Harley Quinn!" Izzy laughed, tossing her bi-coloured ponytails over her shoulder.  

"Isn't that a type of clown?" Alec asked, more confused than ever. 

"Hey guys, let's go!" Clary said as she joined them, holding hands with Jace. "Simon will meet us there."

Clary had painted her face green, and was covered in green spandex and strings of plastic ivy. Jace had a black-and-red mask pulled over his face, and two seraph blades strapped to his back.  

"You look ridiculous," Alec told them. 

"It's a Halloween party! That's what people do - dress up as things that go bump in the night!" Clary said. 

"At the Pandemonium? Where most of the patrons are Downworlders? What are the vamps and werewolves going to go as, _mundanes_?" Alec bit out. "Besides, I don't even know what you guys are dressed up as."

"Superheroes and supervillains, Alec. Even I know that," Jace said. 

"Really. So what are you, then?" Alec asked challengingly. 

"Um... Spideypool."

" _Dead_ pool," Clary corrected with a laugh. "Although I have no problems lending you to Simon for the night."

"You've got to be kidding me. If I swung that way, which I don't, I wouldn't hook-up with that nerdy vampire even if he were the last person on earth," Jace scoffed. "Also, I'm in a happy relationship with you, and Simon is dating Izzy, and-"  

"Methinks the lady doth protest too much," Izzy said, smirking and winking at Clary.

"We're not even there and I'm already tired of this whole thing," Alec declared loudly.

"Don't be such a buzzkill," Izzy laughed. "I know what Magnus is dressing up as, and I _promise_ you it will be worth your while."

 

 

An hour later, surrounded by party-goers in weird clothing, Alec was definitely unimpressed. Magnus was nowhere to be found, and for some reason all the food and drink being served at the Pandemonium tonight was either pumpkin-flavoured, neon orange, or both. To top it all off, his siblings had managed to disappear into the crowd and ditch him at the bar. If he had to watch another werewolf go by dressed as a scantily-clad rabbit, he was going to lose his mind.  

"I thought Izzy said that you were coming as Batman, but it would have been a travesty to hide that face under a mask, anyway," a familiar voice said in his ear. 

"Magnus," Alec said in relief, then nearly swallowed his tongue when he saw what Magnus was wearing: a skin-tight black leather bodysuit, a whip at his hip, a black collar around his neck, a black mask that covered half his face, and a headband with black cat ears. 

"Do you like it? I made it myself," Magnus said, twirling around. 

"You're a... cat?" 

"Genderbent Catwoman. I rather think I missed a trick not coming as Bane, but Izzy insisted."

"I didn't understand a single word you just said," Alec admitted, slipping an arm around Magnus' waist. "But can we go back to the Loft now?" 

Magnus laughed, eyes glinting mischievously. "I have to stay until midnight, and then I'm all yours," he promised Alec. "How about a drink first?" 

"On the house, right?" Jace asked, suddenly appearing at Alec's elbow with Clary, Izzy, and Simon in tow, like demons that had been summoned by the promise of free alcohol. Magnus nodded, and Jace started yelling their orders at the bartender over the din in the Pandemonium.

"What's happening at midnight?" Alec asked Magnus. 

"The DJ plays  _Thriller_ , and everyone dances to it. It's rather entertaining, and a great opportunity to get blackmail-worthy photos," Magnus said with a grin. "Oh, listen - they're counting down to it."

" _10...9...8..._ " the crowd chanted.  

At midnight, a few things happened all at once: a catchy tune played from the speakers, everyone on the dancefloor started lurching around like zombies, and Alec's siblings and their significant others suddenly froze, then stepped away from each other. 

"Harl, I think it's time we blew this joint," Clary said, looking at Jace and Simon with distaste. 

"You're right, Ivy. After all, there's a whole city out there to destroy," Izzy agreed, and they were off before Alec could process what they'd said.  

"Uh-oh. Deadpool, c'mon, we've got to go after them!" Simon said.  

"I think I saw an episode of _Buffy_ that went like this," Jace commented as Simon dragged him away.  

Alec and Magnus exchanged a look, then ran out after them just in time to see Simon and disappearing round the corner with Jace in tow. 

"...What the fuck just happened?" Alec asked. 

 

 

By the angel, Alec _really_  hated Halloween.  

Magnus had figured it out immediately after examining Alec's costume back at the Institute. The costumes were cursed to make the wearer think that they were whoever they were dressed up as; someone must have recognised Simon, and thought it'd be funny, since everyone knew he was with the Shadowhunters. Magnus was certain that the spell would wear off in a couple of hours, so now all they had to do was find the four of them, and try to stop them from destroying New York and killing each other.

It was lucky that the cursed costumes didn't give them the superpowers of whoever they were dressed up as. It was less fortunate that the people being possessed by said costumes were three shadowhunters and a daylighter, so they practically had superpowers of their own. Even worse - about a third of New York seemed to have had the same costume ideas, which Alec discovered after running down his fifth Deadpool-Spiderman couple.

"Where the hell could they be?" Alec asked Magnus, feeling more than a little frantic now. 

"If I were a superhero or supervillain, where would I go to have the most dramatic showdown? Midtown Manhattan? One of those elevated trains?" Magnus asked musingly.  

"The Empire State Building?" Alec suggested. 

Magnus snuck them up to the observation deck at the top of the Empire State Building easily, and sure enough, Alec's siblings and their partners were there - as well as a small crowd that had gathered around to watch.  

"We're not going to let you destroy New York City!" Simon shouted just as Alec made his way to the front of the crowd.  

"I'd like to see you stop us," Clary sneered, and flung a bit of the plastic ivy coiled around her arm in Simon's direction.  

Simon immediately did a weird gesture, after which absolutely nothing happened, then gasped in dismay. "Oh no! My webshooter missed!" 

"Don't worry, I've got this," Jace said, then hesitated when Izzy stepped up. "Wait. Is it sexist to hit you? Is it more sexist to  _not_  hit you?" 

"That so cute, you think you’re scary. Well, mister, I’ve seen scary and you don’t have his smile," Izzy replied sweetly.  

Jace jabbed his double blades at Izzy and the audience gasped when he missed by an inch. Izzy sidestepped and swung her baseball bat, and even before it got near Jace, Alec knew it wasn't going to hit him. His siblings were definitely better fighters than this - it didn't make sense.  

"Uh... What's going on?" Alec whispered. 

Magnus shook his head, laughing with relief. "They're stunt fighting. They're not trying to make actual contact, it just looks good on camera."

"Huh?" 

"I guess whoever did the spell messed up. They're like superheroes being played by actors," Magnus said, already taking out his phone and aiming it at them. 

"What's that for?" Alec asked. 

"Blackmail," Magnus replied.  

Alec huffed out a laugh. "Send me a copy."

Alec saw the exact moment that the spell broke; all of them froze in position, which just happened to be Jace throwing a fake punch at Clary, and Izzy with Simon in a chokehold.

Magnus quickly stepped forward with a flourish to address the crowd. "And that's all we have for you today! Hope you enjoyed our little skit, and Happy Halloween!"   

There was applause and cheers, then the audience scattered, leaving behind four slightly embarrassed fake superheroes and supervillains.  

"I'm exhausted. I don't care what else happens tonight, you four can deal with it," Alec declared as Magnus conjured up a portal discreetly. 

Magnus put a hand on Alec's waist meaningfully as he stepped through the portal with him, and murmured, "Want to help me get out of this ridiculous costume?"  

Alec inhaled sharply and nodded eagerly, already fumbling with the zipper of Magnus' costume, and Magnus laughed brightly as Alec walked him backwards into his bedroom.

Ok, maybe Alec didn't hate Halloween that much after all.


End file.
